Words that Sound Worse Coming From a Child
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Oh God!
That is Jude's current favorite phrase.
It started as "Oh Gosh" but that Gosh rapidly evolved to God.
"Oh Gosh" was cute but "Oh God" made me cringe.
I'm not sure where he picked up either of the phrases. I don't think I use either of them but it only takes one time for kids to repeat a phrase.
Immediately Joe and I reprimanded Jude and told him that "Oh God" was not nice to say. But he continued. I know he doesn't understand the concept of bad words. And Joe and I try very hard to watch what we say around the kids knowing they will repeat anything. But I kept trying to explain that there were words that were nice and words that were not. I don't think it clicked. He didn't understand why some words were bad and others weren't. So I offered up a few alternatives like "Oh Man" or "My Goodness". (I've learn that instead of telling kids to just not do something you need to offer them an alternative - this rule applies to most anything: dangerous situations, bad words, fighting over a toy...) He quickly adjusted to these phrases but has slipped up a few times at which point he quickly turns and looks at me to see if I noticed. I give him my stern mom face and he says sorry then corrects himself to say "Oh Man".
I don't consider myself to be super strict about bad words. I know some parents that consider poop and penis bad words. To me that's just what those things are called. Boys have a penis and everybody poops. Nevertheless, I want my children to be respectful and stay innocent as long as possible.
Its funny how phrases like Oh God, Crap, Stupid or Dumb don't sound that
bad coming from the mouth of an adult but sound horrible when innocent
little children speak them.
How do you deal with bad language from your kids?
5 comments:
Giving alternatives is exactly what you need to do. I used to yell food for words, Oh Sugar Pops, Pop tart was a fun one- I still use that.
When my husband or I swore in front of the kids- the other would say that's not nice mommy/daddy and tell the kids to say it's not nice too.
I have a trucker mouth, I try but it just comes out- my kids never swore when they were little and I didn't hear them swear (say ass/shit) until they were seniors in high school.
When I'm in the presence of little ones, I really try to watch every word, but slip ups are going to happen.
When your kids slip up correct them with another word, if you make a big deal about it, they'll say it more. They will come out with a doozer and it may be something you don't say but they hear everything but don't stress. You're going about everything the right way.
(This is of course for only at the ages when they don't know better)
Your post is making me think. Hard. I have two older children from my first marriage and now two younger (impressionable) children from my final (grins) marriage. This has been such the issue with us. Our older girls have potty mouth, one more than the other. They are young adults. They didn't speak this way in my presence until late in high school, but even then, I tried 'parenting.' I know I didn't utter a curse word in front of my parents until I was nearly 30 and I still don't use profanity much around them. I do sometimes with my friends and I have sadly, allowed some choice words fly in front of my young children. Oddly, when 'parenting' my strong-willed young adult children. When I see the older girls use foul words on social media, I cringe. They are still my babies.
I don't have any answers.
Our son is two and we have a growing list of words that are not allowed in our house: yup, nope (we find them disrespectful), stupid (Obvious reasons, and has resulted in the banning of Peanuts. I never realized how often stupid is said on that cartoon before.) gosh (sounds too much like God) the most recent word to be added is whatever.
Since he is always around us, we must be the culprits of where he has been picking up these words (except yup and nope they are so prevalent where we live, it's inescapable; stupid is Charlie Brown's fault - he also picked up Rats, but I think that one is cute). The way we dealt with it is by telling him the words are inappropriate and cannot be used by our family. If he hears Mommy or Daddy use them he can correct us too. He loves to correct us, which can be difficult with whatever since there is an appropriate way to use that word...we're working on that. I do have to watch him when we're out because he corrects the cashiers for yup and nope :) I tell him different families have different rules.
I have three kids from a previous marriage. They KNOW not to cuss in front of me but will let it all loose when they're at their dad's.
I'm not a religion pusher but the word God said in vain is the worst thing in the world for me. Makes my skin cringe.
Like you mentioned, offer alternatives for words that you don't want heard.
We had good luck when we explained that "Oh God" and "Jesus Christ!" would make God sad to hear. I think our daughter was about 3 at the time. For other words and phrases like "pee-pee head" learned at school we also talked about using words that everyone knows instead of words that not everyone knows. Like, "That wasn't a smart thing to do," instead of "You are a pee-pee head." When she caught her self we praised her and offered candy the first couple times.
Post a Comment